leahlundblog

So many reasons I have decided to write this.  One of the main reasons being that my blog feels like a journal.  A little part of me that allows people into my life & my world of photographing people.  Another being I know for a fact that I am not the only one going through this.  In fact, I hope to reach other women that have been through something similar.  So, here it goes…

Ever since I can remember, I have loved being around babies.  I remember being about 9 years old and carrying around my 8 month old baby cousin even though he was heavy, I was determined to be in charge.  I was always helping babies in the summers at the swimming pool, getting babysitting jobs here & there & of course it explains why I ended up choosing this as a profession.  I’m in awe of children.  Maybe it’s because I had such an amazing childhood.  So innocent & carefree.  And, let’s be honest…kids say some of the funniest things!

When I was 14, my love grew like I never would have imagined.  I became an aunt.  Hayley was born in March of 1994 and from that moment on my life has revolved around my nieces, nephews and family.  When Hayley was a baby, I was over at my sisters house all. The. Time.  Sometimes I would even “pretend” that she just woke up on her own…even though I crept into her room and patted her back until she woke up.  Oops.  Following Hayley,  came Hannah 2 years later & then Shelby in 1998.  In 2001, my brother and Jen welcomed Harper & 8 months later, my sister had Emma.  Baby girls everywhere!  I loved it.  I was very involved in their lives & always loved watching them, being the aunt, spoiling them & going over to visit any chance I got.  My brother & Jen had the first boy in October of 2005, Beckett.  A little boy to spoil!  I still spoil him rotten.  My sister welcomed Gavin in 2008, who is such a great kid even with all of his big sisters to harass him.  Five of those little nuggets, I got to witness coming into the world.  It was both the scariest thing and the most amazing thing I have ever seen.  I knew for so long that I, too would one day become a mother.

Meeting & of course marrying Simeon was the best thing to happen to me next to becoming an aunt to 7 amazing kiddos.  Simeon has always been my center, the calm to my crazy & the love of my life.  We both knew we wanted kids eventually.  Ok, before this gets all ‘Debbie Downer’…recently we discovered that we would have a little challenge ahead of us in making this dream become a reality.  After trying for quite some time, we decided it would be best to get some answers & take it to the pros.

The first thing we discovered is I have 2 blocked tubes.  That was an answer right then and there.  We would most likely need to do In Vitro Fertilization.  Then, after more testing, we discovered I have a benign tumor (fibroid) and it had most likely been there for years and years.  Could explain a lot of things I had going on throughout my adult life thus far.  The good thing is, unlike a lot of women, there is just one.  It’s big, but it’s just one.  We are thankful for that.  Basically this is the beginning of our journey.  I have chosen to do the surgery & remove this giant tumor that is there & hope that we can find a way to do it that is less invasive than the full blown incision myomectomy.

We will be meeting with our first possible surgeon soon.  I am both excited and nervous, but mostly just ready to get this out of me.  A few things can happen after we do this.  Everything could go back to normal, my uterus will not be so squished in there & my tubes could very well open up.  We could also see more scar tissue form, my tubes remain closed & risk (although uncommon) permanent damage to my uterus.  Either way, as of now we plan on doing IVF once we get the “go ahead” after my surgery.

This is by far the most personal I have ever been on here, but I was talking to my husband recently & honestly, I need this.  I need people to know.  I want people who are thinking about starting a family & are having no luck, to do all the necessary things to find out.  I also want to start blogging more about our journey.  I may even start a different blog just for this.  I would like to have this to read to our children someday.  If we end up doing IVF, Lord knows I will be a hormonal mess & I would love to have somewhere to vent.  Overall, we are the most positive people we can be.  I know there are women out there who are told they will never have children & don’t get the answers to why?  And women out there going through a very similar thing that I am.  We are beyond thankful that there is a solution to my situation.  I know now–more than ever–why God chose Simeon for me…he is my rock & the most positive person I know.  Above all else, this is all part of God’s plans.

The most ironic thing for me from all of this?  At some point in my 20′s I had a feeling…nothing more–that I would need a little boost to get pregnant on my own.  Maybe that was God’s way of preparing me & why I haven’t shed a tear throughout this.  And then again, I also had dreams about 6 months ago before we knew any of this that we had multiples…I had this dream more than once.  Again, I think that was God’s way of preparing me for that possibility…or I would like to think that it was.

I know one thing.  We can handle anything.  We are more than ready for the biggest journey of it all & we are so thankful to have our family & friends throughout this.  I will have to keep you posted as I have now started something I believe.  Ha!  Thank you for taking the time to read this!!!

Much love…

And because it’s always better with a photo…here are my nieces & nephews….